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[denim&lace]

Our pastor is going through the book of Esther with us.  Today we went over the part where Esther had decided to go in to the king, and she asked others to fast with her before she went...  and then our pastor went deeper into the practice of fasting and prayer.  He talked about how Jesus fasted, taught on fasting, and expected us to fast (though He didn't command it.) 

I got to thinking.   

I want to honor my husband with my support in prayer and fasting.  I know that there are several here whose husbands have struggles and challenges that they have asked for prayer for.  I would chance it to say that every husband faces some challenge and could benefit from having their wife dedicate a day of prayer for him.  Would any of you like to join me in prayer and fasting once a week for our husbands?  I was thinking Sunday night to Monday night would work great for me and would maybe help get my husbands work week started off on a good note.  Say 4pm to 4pm? 

If it is appropriate I thought we might be willing to share certain verses that we are praying for/over our husbands as well... 

A wise woman once told me the best prayer I could pray for my husband is "God, please make me the wife my husband needs me to be."  So, this week I am going to look up verses about how God can change and grow ME... in ways that will bless my husband. 

MODERATORS: if this is inappropriate or posted in the wrong place, please feel free to move or delete.     

[joyofthelord]

Denim - I love your idea!  I have seen great things happen when a person has fasted.  The times you mentioned also work well for me.  I'll be watching this thread for further updates.

[khix]

Can I ask some practical questions?

Isn't fasting supposed to be done in secret?

If so, how will you be able to do it without your husband & children knowing about it?  And if it's ok for your dh to know about it, is he supposed to know that you are fasting and praying for him?

Also, what about the specifics of meal times & cooking for the family?  Do you cook a meal, sit them down, and leave the room to go pray?  To me, that doesn't seem right to leave your family while they are eating a family meal together.  What about on Monday, do you leave your children to themselves while they eat breakfast & lunch?  I'm just wondering, practically, HOW does this work?  When your kids ask, "Mom, why aren't you eating with us?", what do you tell them? 

[IMPersuadd]

Hi Khix,

Well, I haven't been able to fast in over 7 years with being either pg or nursing that whole time.  Youngest just weaned so I will be able to again.  I'll try to explain how I/we did things in our home.

First, I don't believe it is supposed to be an absolute secret - just that we aren't supposed to flaunt the fact.  I think it obvious that our family would know.  But outside of that there is probably no reason for folks to be aware of it.  If you have to be out and about and someone offers you something it is easy to just politely decline.

I would cook normally for my family and sit with them as I usually would.  Prayer and fasting doesn't have to mean that every second you would have been eating you are praying.  It means a time is set aside when you put down your flesh and concentrate on prayer.  Typically a 24 hour period but the Bible has a variety of fasts.  You shouldn't be abandoning your family.  :-)

When my children ask why I am not eating, it is simple - mommy is fasting today.  If they are old enough to ask what that is, or why, answer simply.  Like most other answers with children, give them what they need to know in a proper way.

I personally think it critical that one doesn't get moody or irritable while fasting.  That is sort of like the female counterpart of the "poor me" guy in the Bible.  :-)

And as your children get older and are saved and able to participate you may be able to fast together.  When our 1st batch were teenagers, hubby would decide a day each week and we would all fast that day.  It certainly made it easier from the temptation factor with no one cooking/eating.  :-)  We did not all necessarily have to pray for the same thing as one's burdens may be personal and shouldn't be dictated by another, but we did spend time together in prayer and there is something about the power that comes when we are willing to put self aside for a bit and take some extra time and focus on praying.  :-)

D&L, GREAT IDEA!  And I can participate again.  :-)  Thank you!

[BJ_BOBBI_JO]

I had originally posted the below in the Bible questions board. But beings as how most of the men probably work full time they don't have time to answer it in a timely manner so it could take weeks to get any kind of reply sometimes. And fasting is something I dont want to take weeks for because I would like to do some fasting here soon and in serious prayers over some issues if I can.

Perhaps someone here can shed some light on my few questions and give me your opinion and thoughts about them.

I should go into more detail in order to make it clear.-----My husband and I do believe it is OK to do what some call partial fasting where they give up certain foods  like something they eat a lot like coffee or a certain meal like supper for example to fast. But I thought it was on this forum ( I could be wrong) on another thread I was told that partial fasting was wrong because they did not do it like then back in the Bible. I don't understand using that analogy because they also did not communicate via the Internet, drive cars, wear jeans, have leather bound black Bibles,  wear gym shoes and shop at wal mart back then so does that mean we should not either?  You see the ridiculousness in that I'm sure.

I'm just needing some more thoughts from others on fasting. My husband is rather quiet about it  and I am free to seek advice, thoughts and opinions from others and he is OK with that as well.


Below is what I posted on the other thread:

Is fasting something every believer should do?

If so how would someone like me go about fasting when I am a brittle diabetic?
The diabetic part gets in the way because there have been times I was fasting and my sugar would go very low which required me to have to eat or drink something right away which in turn broke my fast. I cant help but to think God gets upset over me having to break a fast and my prayers might not get answered or worse yet punishment would happen. But that is most likely coming from my judgemental legalistic growing up years where God was often times made out to be the great punisher of all who cant be perfect)

Why does with holding food from ones self make God answer their prayers?


If one cant fast then what else can they do?

I have read the scriptures on fasting but still don't get it. Sometimes I just need a little extra help in understanding. Thank you.

[IMPersuadd]

BJ,

I can try to answer as I/we understand.  :-)  We believe and our pastor teaches that if there are physical reasons for a person to partially fast that that is OK.  God certainly knows.  :-)  And that there are times that a person cannot fast - not physically safe - God knows that too.  Our pastor says that for the "average" healthy person, a 24 hour fast is reasonable.  If there are health concerns, doing a juice fast or liquid fast is a good possibility.  Personally I did a three day fast once and after the first day it got easier.  :-) 

I have heard preaching and it "makes sense" that basically your body (flesh) will lie to you, will tell you "you are dying", etc. cuz it is just not used to going without and not being in control.  And that that is probably one of the main reasons for fasting - simply to put your body under and teach it who is boss.  :-)  How that ties into prayer I don't fully understand - but I do know this - the ONLY version of the Bible that has retained the teaching about prayer and fasting TOGETHER is the KJB so that tells me there must be something to it that the devil doesn't like.  :-)

hth,
Lori

[kamom]

   This is a topic that is dear to my heart. Thank you for starting this thread and for the encouragement. If you can't find the answers in the bible I would encourage those who are interested to read the book "Fasting" by Jentezen Franklin. It will answer many questions for you as to how, why and what is biblical fasting.

 I am and have seen amazing results in my own life, in my family and in our circumstances that God moved in answer to paryer and fasting. It seems like many believers are missing out on great blessing because it's not practised more faithfully.

 I have been hesitant telling others about it because it's not supposed to be bragged about, but how else to share the blessing with others then to tell them the benefits?

 BJ, have you tried looking up the verses that mention fasting and the differant fasts that people did. If I remember right Daniel was only doing a "partial" fast when the angel came to him. Remember God sees the heart, but it's a great honor to him when he sees that we are more desperate to hear from him that to feed our bellies.

[denim&lace]

BJ,

Is fasting something every believer should do?

This is Jesus teaching on fasting... notice He doesn't say "if you fast"...

Mat 6:16 Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.


 Mat 6:17  But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face;


 Mat 6:18  That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.

I added the emphasis.  

In my opinion this statement is like when I tell my kids, "When you make your bed you need to tuck the sheets like so."
it isn't a question of whether they should make their beds.  They have a bed, they sleep in it, they are expected to make it... the only question is 'how should they go about doing it?'.

If so how would someone like me go about fasting when I am a brittle diabetic?
The diabetic part gets in the way because there have been times I was fasting and my sugar would go very low which required me to have to eat or drink something right away which in turn broke my fast. I cant help but to think God gets upset over me having to break a fast and my prayers might not get answered or worse yet punishment would happen. But that is most likely coming from my judgemental legalistic growing up years where God was often times made out to be the great punisher of all who cant be perfect)

 

You know, I have sugar issues as well.  Not only that, but I am nursing a baby.  Still, I plan to fast.  I don't think a partial fast is going to bring hell's judgement and damnation down on you.    I thought I'd do a full 24 hour fast from food a time or two, drinking plenty of water still and see how that affects my milk supply and sugar levels...  if it's too much I'll add in a cup of milk for some of my regular meal times.  I think the point is to set yourself, your flesh, aside for a time.  IMO God see's the heart of the person doing a partial fast with a pure heart just as well as He sees the heart of the "hypocrites, of a sad countenance".  I'd trust Him to sort it all out.

As for your other questions, I don't know the answers.  I'm pretty sure we can't MAKE God do anything... fasting or not.  In my opinion fasting is just setting yourself aside in such a way that you are telling God with your actions that you are willing to submit yourself, even your flesh, to Him.  

Esther 4:16  Go, gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink three days, night or day: I also and my maidens will fast likewise; and so will I go in unto the king, which [is] not according to the law: and if I perish, I perish.

It doesn't appear (to me) that Esther knew one way or the other what the affect of their fasting would be, only that she was willing to place herself in God's hands and let Him decide the outcome.  

Also, this passage in Ezra seems to me to be saying something similar.

Ezr 8:21  Then I proclaimed a fast there, at the river of Ahava, that we might afflict ourselves before our God, to seek of him a right way for us, and for our little ones, and for all our substance.

But in all truth, I don't know for sure why fasting draws God's attention to our plea differently than any old regular prayer.  And I have no idea what we could offer as a substitute for fasting.

I HTH's

[~esposita~]

In the past, seeing that I always seem to be pg/nursing, I have committed myself to fast from desserts & sweets (or something dear to you!)  for ____ amount of time (this I do for extended periods as ANYone can miss a DAY of sweets!)

Just an idea.  I HAVE seen this as effective, especially when I am 'fasting' on behalf of my DH.

[khix]

In the past, seeing that I always seem to be pg/nursing, I have committed myself to fast from desserts & sweets (or something dear to you!)  for ____ amount of time (this I do for extended periods as ANYone can miss a DAY of sweets!)

Just an idea.  I HAVE seen this as effective, especially when I am 'fasting' on behalf of my DH.

This got me thinking - what about fasting from tangible items, like the computer, the TV, reading books, etc, etc....anything that could take time away from God....instead of spending time doing whatever it is you normally do, you spend that time in prayer instead.  Would that be considered "fasting" for those who couldn't go without food?

[Beth]

D&L, 
       I like this idea a lot. I would like to join in. I just now read this thread though. So did anyone start today? Or is it next Monday?

[provided4]

I started out today skipping the coffee so I'm going to jump on board and fast as well.
One thing since someone mentioned Daniel, I thought he determined not to eat the Kings meals that were provided. So in essence it was a partial fast because he ate only fruits and vegetables, right? Fasting is to break the flesh...break our weaknesses....so if your weakness is sweets or junk food a fast from those things would show your willingness to submit, right?

[khix]

I think I will jump on board too.  Not sure if I will fast from food...because I think God is telling to fast from something else right now...but I will fast & pray.  Also, because something has come to my attention, I may do this sooner than Monday.

[denim&lace]

This is awesome! 

I'm excited to get started.  I plan to officially start next Monday.  Yesterday I ate like a maniac and I thought, "Oh no! I won't be able to do this!"  Come to find out it was pms....  it caught me by surprise.  I'm feeling better now.      

I don't know about the rest of you, but for me prayer is terribly hard work.  So often I commit to pray and I go into a quiet spot for a time to pray and I have the hardest time focusing and such that I get very little communication time in...  so this week I am praying for help with praying!  For ears to hear and eyes to see.  For wisdom and for my mind to be quieted.  For a spirit of power and love and a sound mind... 

So Khix, when I pray these things for myself today I will pray them for you as well, since you may be getting an early start on us.   

I'm so glad to see so many joining in.  I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God! 
 

[khix]

So Khix, when I pray these things for myself today I will pray them for you as well, since you may be getting an early start on us.   

Yes, thank you so much!  Could definitely use some prayers!

Speaking of focus, what would you do about little distractions...aka kids?  There have been times I've gone into my room/bathroom for whatever private reason, but there's always the inevitable knock at the door, and the "Mommy!" coming from the other side.

[denim&lace]

How old are they?

I'm to the point that my oldest can 'take over' for a time so I think you and I are in different seasons.  My children are 12, 9, 7, and almost 7 months. 

If yours are young enough to need naps still you may take advantage of that time.  Or, if they sleep in after Daddy has gone to work you might use that time instead/as well.  Maybe dedicate a 'quiet time'  or 'siesta' every day.  Have them go to their room and play or look at books quietly for X amount of time...  set a timer.  When the timer goes off they are free to come find Momma again.  You may have to take a week to train for that, but once they see that they aren't allowed to be loud or come to you early then they will settle into the routine of it.  I always used the timer on the stove.  My 7 year old still prefers to work, eat, rest, brush his teeth, etc. to the timer...      it would annoy me if it wasn't so much like ME~

I'm praying that you will find a solution to this challenge too.    What a blessing to have such a challenge!  Healthy children that want to be with their Momma.     

[Sunshine06]

I'd like to join you ladies too. I'm not sure how regularly I will do this, but I do plan to fast for at least the next two Mondays (for a specific request).  Thanks for putting the thought out there D&L - I know that this will be a great way to challenge myself and honor hubby while spending time with God (how can you lose?  ).  I also have a hard time keeping focused while praying, but I plan to have either my Bible or (if at work) some verses written down that I can pray when I can't think of anything to say for myself. I'm really looking forward to it!

[khix]

How old are they?

I'm to the point that my oldest can 'take over' for a time so I think you and I are in different seasons.  My children are 12, 9, 7, and almost 7 months. 

If yours are young enough to need naps still you may take advantage of that time.  Or, if they sleep in after Daddy has gone to work you might use that time instead/as well.  Maybe dedicate a 'quiet time'  or 'siesta' every day.  Have them go to their room and play or look at books quietly for X amount of time...  set a timer.  When the timer goes off they are free to come find Momma again.  You may have to take a week to train for that, but once they see that they aren't allowed to be loud or come to you early then they will settle into the routine of it.  I always used the timer on the stove.  My 7 year old still prefers to work, eat, rest, brush his teeth, etc. to the timer...      it would annoy me if it wasn't so much like ME~

I'm praying that you will find a solution to this challenge too.    What a blessing to have such a challenge!  Healthy children that want to be with their Momma.     

Thanks!

OK, I plan on either tomorrow or Thursday morning for short time, before the kids get up...maybe both mornings...or maybe tonight...pray instead of watching the news.  So, can ya'll pray for me during these times?  Also, I know I will have hard time knowing what to pray for, or what verses to pray....so pray for that too.  Thanks!

[lovetoreadmom]

I don't know about the rest of you, but for me prayer is terribly hard work.  So often I commit to pray and I go into a quiet spot for a time to pray and I have the hardest time focusing and such that I get very little communication time in...  so this week I am praying for help with praying!  For ears to hear and eyes to see.  For wisdom and for my mind to be quieted.  For a spirit of power and love and a sound mind... 

D&L,

Do you have a written list, a prayer journal or do you pray out loud?  I don't mean so that everyone can hear, "Oh, she is praying."  Just to have a way of staying focused, and this can be so helpful sometimes.

I know when I can look at things (list) and hear myself it helps me to stay focused.  I don't speak at a normal sound level, just enough to help me like when I'm having a conversation w/ anyone.  That's what we're doing in a sense, right, having a conversation w/ God?   

I also like the idea of fasting from things other than food.  Sometimes our flesh needs to be away from certain things, while our bodies themselves can't be w/o nourishment (b/c of pregnancy, nursing, other health issues).  As many have said here, the Lord knows our hearts (and our bodies). 

[Beth]

I have also found that praying out loud helps me to focus and keep my train of thought going. It doesn't need to be loud even a whisper seems to be enough. And yes a list is also helpful. Looking forward to Monday.  Its been a while since I fasted and prayed.

[khix]

What I have found to be most amazing this week, is that as I've been praying for my man, God's also been teaching ME some things!  Go figure!    

I will try to participate, even partially, on Monday as well! 

[denim&lace]

I do pray out loud... I almost 'can't' pray silently.  Even as a kid when the SS teachers would say "God can always hear you, even if you are just thinking your prayer."  I would think, "Maybe He can... but I can't!" 

I usually keep a list, and even scripture cards with verses written that I would like to use... though sometimes my 'conversations' don't go in the direction I intended, once I get there.   

I think well on my feet.  Moving around, working, DOING.  Just sitting and trying to think or converse makes me crazy and before long my mind either wanders or goes into 'time out'.  School was tourture... but usually my teachers loved me, which is different than what you usually hear about.

So glad you'll be joining us on Monday too Khix.  You've been on my mind quite a bit.  Still praying for you.

So far we have:

BJ
Beth
Khix
Sunshine06
provided4
love toreadmom... were  you joining us?
D&L

Wow!  I'm excited! 

See ya'll on Monday!

 

[BJ_BOBBI_JO]

I know it starts on Monday but how long will it last?

[khix]

I know it starts on Monday but how long will it last?

It starts 4pm on Sunday (the 27th) and ends 4 pm on Monday (the 28th).

[joyofthelord]

count me in!

[denim&lace]

Yea!  Glad to have you joyofthelord!

I plan on doing this until I get a couple of answers on a couple of issues BJ... be it  2 weeks, 2 months or 2 years!

Got a late start tonight as we had things going on.  I'll be sticking it out through Tuesday morning now. 

[Beth]

I'll be praying for you ladies today. God give all wisdom to be the  helpmeets He intended us to be.

[khix]

I was only able to do this for a short time this morning, but this time combined with last week, all I can say is....wow!  I will definitely be doing this more often.  I think God is changing/teaching me MORE than He is changing/teaching my dh right now!  But, that's a good thing!   

[Beth]

you know I found the same thing to be true. The Lord is showing me many ways that I can change my life. And that is one thing I have the ability to change. (with the power of Christ of course)
so how did everyones day go? It was a good day for me. I asked for wisdom on some things and I believe He has given and will continue to do so. Praise God!

[Sunshine06]

I really enjoyed yesterday. While I had some specific requests, I think I more enjoyed just meditating on Scripture and spending time with God. He convicted and taught me some things about what he desires of me and He's teaching me what it means to trust him regardless of what DH does (and he's not doing anything terrible, I can just get all worried about the future and decisions DH might make in the future which is really silly!  ) So I'm really looking forward to next week!

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