WHEN HUSBAND REFUSES PROVISION

Quote from: BibleQuestion on October 22, 2009, 01:19:21 PM

1Timothy 5:8
But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

This passage does not mention marriage, divorce, or wives.

OK, not sure what passage you are referring to... I am going to guess you mean just the one phrase taken out of context. So, here is the entire passage with my paraphrase / understanding of the meaning:

1 Tim 5:3 Honour widows that are widows indeed.	Here is the context: Timothy, tell the congregation to support and care for true widows (more on this later).
But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable before God.	Note that older single women that have family in the church, are to be cared for by them... nephews, sons, etc... presumably their brothers are very old themselves, or passed away by now.
Now she that is a widow indeed, and desolate, trusteth in God, and continueth in supplications and prayers night and day. But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth. And these things give in charge, that they may be blameless.	A true widow is indeed without hope of provision... she is old, generally unmarriageable, and has no one to provide for her. Note that this is different than a woman who by whatever means has options. The one being taken into the care of the church will dedicate herself to the work of the church, the other will take advantage of the free ride. Give this understanding as a command to the body so that the women in question will be blameless.
But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.	Not saying here that a man should not care for his mother / aunt if she is destitute so that she will do the work of the church or whatever... if a man refuses to care for his own mother or aunt or near kinswoman... he is worse to you than an unbeliever.
Let not a widow be taken into the number under threescore years old, having been the wife of one man, Well reported of for good works; if she have brought up children, if she have lodged strangers, if she have washed the saints' feet, if she have relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every good work.	Make sure that the widows that the church supports are at least 60 years old, not an adulteress, well known for her good works like raising good children, taking in strangers, caring for the believers, helped the poor / hungry / sick and in general made a diligent life of good deeds.
But the younger widows refuse: for when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry; Having damnation, because they have cast off their first faith. And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. For some are already turned aside after Satan.	But do not take care of the younger widows... after serving the church for a time, they will rather do to other things besides that work and will want to re-marry. For this they will be damned of God since He was their head and they now look for another. Even if they are sufficed in the work of the Church, they will be idle and busybodied... doing things that are not right. So, to avoid this, the women that are under 60 years old, marry. If possible bear children, and in any case guide their husband's house... giving no occasion for the devil to accuse them or the church on their part. For you know that some have already turned back to Satan.
If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed.	In short, as confirms the law, let the widow's family take care of any widow, the body should not be burdened. As concerns the body, let them only take care of true widows as mentioned above.

So... the idea here is that a man must take care of his widowed mother / aunt / near kinswoman as is demonstrated by Jewish culture of the day as they (more or less) followed the law that God gave the Hebrews. Why would a man be burdened with this?

It comes from the construction of the law. A woman belonged to her husband in a possessive sense. Even in the case of a woman that he had purchased as a servant, he had to feed, clothe and house her. If he chose to marry her once she was his, he could not even decrease her position without risk of loosing her. Let's say he moved her from the servant's quarters to his house (a likely scenario if she was his wife) he could never move her back to the servants quarters, or she would be free to leave. How much more a slight would it be for a woman that was betrothed (not purchased as a servant) and married if her husband told her that she had to earn her own money and pay her own way? Not that a woman was not expected to work in the house, etc... but that she was not expected under any condition to work for another man for hire.

This is the context in which Paul says, "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel." The statement is generic. It would include all that belongs to him. Animals, children, wife, all... in an extended sense this also includes his widowed mother, aunt, possibly a blood sister who is a believer and whose husband was not a believer and left her... her children not being old enough to care for her themselves. Now Paul's statement here is for this sister to re-marry... but in the mean time, she would be cared for by her brother.

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Could you walk us through how you establish Biblically that a wife not provided for by her husband is being ‘put away’ as you call it? If she is free to go from a man that refuses to provide for her, how is she then free to marry (Biblically) another as Forevergirl said here:

Quote from: ForeverGirl on September 30, 2009, 10:01:15 AM

It sounds to me like your DH isn't acting like a husband, and that he (possibly) never has. These actions, or lack thereof, leave you free to seek another head unless your current DH should (now, before you remarry) repent and put on the "works" of a husband by providing raiment, food, and duty of marriage for you thus making it possible for you to stay at home and be a keeper at home. IMO, he needs to know exactly what is required of him in order to have you as a wife:

OK, so a husband that is given over to the flesh such that he cannot adequately provide for a wife: he spends his money and strength on alcohol or entertainment or fancy cars or whatever that would keep him from providing simple housing, food, clothing and duty of marriage to his wife. In this case Paul is saying that some would say, "Oh, my mother is a widow indeed... she is over 60, she was a good woman, all that... so the church should take care of her!" This is a frank refusal based on greed, and Paul judges such a one as worse that a typical unbeliever. Note that Jesus dealt with this same issue here:

Mar 7:8 For laying aside the commandment of God, ye hold the tradition of men, [as] the washing of pots and cups: and many other such like things ye do. And he said unto them, Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.

You forsake the law of God by extending the law in ways that will never work. You take these man made extensions and let them overturn the words of God!

For Moses said, Honour thy father and thy mother; and, Whoso curseth father or mother, let him die the death: But ye say, If a man shall say to his father or mother, [It is] Corban, that is to say, a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me; [he shall be free]. And ye suffer him no more to do ought for his father or his mother; Making the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered: and many such like things do ye.

Moses told you to honor your father and mother and that if any curse their father and mother, they are to be put to death. But you... all you say is, "Dad, I dedicated the back 40 and the small house to God hit the road." and refuse to care for him... and the teachers say to you, that is OK! You overthrow the word of God because of your own supposedly righteous tradition.

The point is that the entire Bible agrees. If one place seems to contradict another, it is useful to take the context of the one and expand it, likewise expanding the context of the other until you see how they both inter-mesh.

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Why would the admonition in I Corinthians 7:39 not apply here (which says she cannot remarry as long as the husband lives)?
The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.

Could you take the time to show us how to study to know these things for ourselves?

OK, so... let's expand the context. Here is a slightly longer passage... actually the passage starts back in chapter 5, but a few verses in 7 is enough to answer this question:

36 But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.	If a man has a virgin daughter, and he thinks that it would be unkind / not right toward her to keep her, and she is of marriageable age, and it is a necessary thing... let him marry her off, he does not sin.
37 Nevertheless he that standeth stedfast in his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will, and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin, doeth well.	On the other hand, if a man decides like a husband, that he can keep his virgin daughter for life, and isn't likely to change his mind, and had decided that it is right... he does well also.
38 So then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well; but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better.	The man that marries his daughter off does well, the man that keeps her in his house does better (as I mentioned above about men that remain virgins and do not marry), but neither do wrong
39 The wife woman is bound by the law as long as her husband head / lord / man with power liveth; but if her husband head / lord / man with power be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.	Of course, the virgin daughter is only bound to her father as long as he lives, and after he dies she may marry whomever she will, but only in Christ.
40 But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.	In conclusion, I believe that she will be happier if she stays single in her father's house... and I think the Spirit of God has instructed me thus.

Note that this places the verse in a very specific context... meaning that we cannot extract a general idea directly (but possibly by implication). Instead that the general idea exists elsewhere. Also that if the verse in Timothy seems to contradict, it probably doesn't. It simply also needs to have its context "expanded" until we see the overall intent of the author... in the case of Timothy and Corinthians, the same author!

--gabe

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